Find the Gift

Have you heard that before, ‘Find the Gift’ or “Everything happens for a reason and that reason is to assist me”.

That call to action can rub a person the wrong way depending on what you may currently be going through.

I have recently had some serious deep healing coming up related to my childhood sexual abuse. It’s taken me to a dark place at times.

Hearing Find the Gift! has made me want to scream and throw things, like a little child, at times. There is NO EFFIN GIFT! This is where my mind took me not too long ago.

Sure, I can be more empathetic to others, I can have more compassion, blah blah blah. This doesn’t sound like a gift worth the pain, at least not in the moment the betrayal, anger and pain are so choking me.

I know my Aunt has felt very burdened by finding the gift or blessing in her husband and best friend being suddenly taken from her from a massive heart attack. “Where’s the gift in that?”

There is one thing I know to be true. Everything DOES happen for a reason and that reason IS to support me, whether I like it or not.

If I go back to my abuse and really identify with it I can find the gift, the blessing if I am ready to let go of my anger and rage.

The gift is that I was a victim (not many situations have real victims).

Why or how does being a victim translate into a blessing, you may wonder?

Through being a victim I have so much more clarity on the opposite which is living an Empowered Life. I have been blessed to learn what that truly means and how to not only get it but live it.

This is something not many people really do, live Empowered. I only am because I have been forced to identify with that in order to get out of being a victim. THE HARDEST THING I HAVE EVER DONE. Trust me it’s easier, although not as fulfilling and happy, to just stay the victim of life.

There are times I want to throw my head against the wall and tap out, I’m done, it’s not worth it. I have recently been in one of these places. BUT I have come too far to turn back now.

I made a decision I AM WORTH IT, I am worth fighting for and I am worth showing up for, I am worth going through the hard times, the pain. And I WILL put on my shoes every day and go to work for myself and the life I want.

So, let me ask you this question “WHERE IS THE GIFT?”.

Are you willing to let go of your judgments, anger and pain to find it yet?

Next week, I will talk about why finding the gift is so important and key to your healing.

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